Pet Photography, Part 2: Cats + Chickens

Hello, dears!

I hope you all had a marvelous Thanksgiving! I had the most exciting one ever, which I cannot wait to post about soon. But for now… I’m back with the second part of my pet photography collection! Today we shall visit our two cats and several chickens (including our baby chicks which are now almost grown up!).

This post might not be quite as adorable as the first one, but OH MY, the photos are much more amusing. :’D I hope you enjoy!

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Ahem. I Have an Announcement.

Warning: this is going to be a loooong post. Our cat Jinx is prepared to dive in with you if you’re ready to go with him. All set? Okay.

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POOR THING. This was not my doing. It was my siblings’ (but of course).

Ahem. GUYS. I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU. Something I have been waiting to announce for almost a year. I am super excited but also super sad to say…

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Short Story: The Animals’ Court

Hello there, dear readers! Today I wanted to post this short story which I wrote for school a while ago. 🙂 It was supposed to be a humorous paper, so I hope you find it funny. XD Ahem.

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The Animal’s Court  

One clear night after all the lights of the farmhouse had disappeared and only the stars were left, a queer noise issued from the open doors of the old white barn. Of course, no one was there to hear it but the stars, but they all twinkled and sparkled with curiosity, and drew closer to the remarkable scene inside.

Quite a selection of animals were milling about on the spacious barn floor, carefully stepping between holes and past creaky floorboards. Various moos, clucks, barks, meows, and grunts mingled together in loud cacophony, until finally one of the rabbits stamped her hind feet in frustration.

“Order! Order! I demand order!” a large black rabbit named Diamond grunted ferociously as she hopped onto a dilapidated haybale. The animals gradually quieted, the last whispered moos and clucks dying away under the fierce stare of the doe. Once the barn was silent, Diamond continued.

“Now. As you know, we have called this meeting because we rabbits have heard your various complaints and wholeheartedly agree with you: something simply must be done about those pestiferous humans. Tonight the humans are on trial and you, the jury, must give us the verdict: guilty or not guilty. We shall begin with the largest witnesses first, and move towards the smaller. Mrs. Cowe, will you please step forward?”

A large, black and white Holstein cow plodded ponderously over to the haybale, mouth munching casually in time to her slow-swinging tail.

“Yes, Diamond ma’am, Your Honor,” she mooed in her deep placid voice. “You called? Mmm… what am I supposed to do?”

“I hereby request that you unburden your soul to us, your dearest comrades, upon the subject of humankind and its many erring ways.”

A vaguely puzzled look crossed Mrs. Cowe’s face. “Ah, would you… would you mind repeating that, Your Honor?” she said slowly, a frown of concentration furrowing her large brow.

Willow, an absurdly fluffy rabbit, heaved a sigh and shook her furry head. “Never mind, Mrs. Cowe. I’ll translate for you. What Diamond means to say is, can you tell us your experience with humans and explain why you either admire or dislike them?”

Diamond glared at Willow, but Mrs. Cowe looked relieved. “Ah, yes. Of course, Your Honor. Well I think, and this is just my opinion of course, that humans are a bit too intrusive, if you know what I mean. Why just the other day the tallest human-girl was ambling around, poking a strange black box in our faces. I can tell you in nearly frightened me to death! And the way that thing clicked! As if it would explode any minute. I tell you I nearly choked on my cud. I… I just down hold with those folks, even if they do give us pretty good eats, but of course that’s just my personal opinion.”

Diamond blinked slowly. She sighed. Then she said in a dry voice. “Very well, Mrs. Cowe. Thank you kindly for your very perceptive witness statement.”

Mrs. Cowe looked inordinately pleased at this dubious praise. A wide, lopsided grin spread across her great mouth, and she ambled happily back to her place among the animals.

Diamond stamped her hind feet sharply on the haybale, calling for order although the hush still prevailed. “We will now hear a statement from Magnolia the Labrador retriever, or Maggie, as most of us know her.”

Diamond’s iron composure faltered slightly at the sight of Maggie’s wide, toothy smile, despite the fact that all animals had sworn a truce for the night. She gulped.

Maggie trotted happily up to the haybale, waving her tail.

“Hello, Your Honor!” she barked brightly. Maggie always spoke in exclamation points. “I am very happy to be here tonight! I am also very happy to say that I, for one, entirely approve of humans! They are kind, loving, and altogether wonderful pets, as far as I am concerned! I would highly recommend them! Of course, they do need a considerable amount of protecting – there’s a strange beast down the hill from their house that they just do not seem to notice, no matter how much I warn them – but I am more than happy to protect them! Are you feeling happy today, Your Honor? You look exceptionally tast- I mean beautiful!”

Diamond lifted her ears a bit higher at this, and looked more tolerantly at the energetic dog. “I’m feeling alright, yes. Thank you, Maggie. You may go now. Mr. and Mrs. Clukken, may I call you up?”

Maggie’s tongue swept surreptitiously over her chops at the sight of the two chickens, but she immediately regained her self-possession and bounced back to her spot.

Mr. Clukken was always “training” himself to be a world-class flyer, much to the dismay of the many chickens who happened to intercept his unsteady path. Mrs. Clukken was a nervous bird, always clucking softly to herself and casting fearful glances at her overbearing husband.

Mr. Clukken now strutted importantly up to the forlorn haybale and cleared his throat. “Ahem. I believe I speak for all chicken-kind when I say that humans are nothing but a menace, an absolute menace to chicken society. Right, Mrs. Clukken?” he demanded, jerking his head sideways toward his wife.

“Oh, certainly, dear,” she agreed, jerking her head up and down rapidly in emphatic agreement.

Mr. Clukken looked satisfied. “For instance, how are we supposed to continue our line of offspring when they mysteriously snatch away our eggs?”

“How, indeed?” echoed Mrs. Clukken sadly.

Mr. Clukken gave what he judged to be a tear-inducing crow of sadness (but which really sounded more like the cry of a wounded duck), and fluttered pompously off of the haybale.

Diamond winced. “Mmm… Excellent testimony, Mr. and Mrs. Clukken. Now may I call up Jinx the cat?”

Jinx did not look entirely happy to be crowded into this dusty barn with so many disgusting, uncivilized animals, but he merely waved his tail gracefully and narrowed his eyes until they looked properly bored and condescending for such an occasion.

“Hmm, you called, Your Honor?” he meowed in a somewhat sarcastic tone. “I have heard you wish to speak to me on the topic of humans, which happens to be a topic I find most unpleasant. In essence, I live with humans because I would never stoop to the wandering life of a barn tomcat, even if it would mean freedom from human trials.” A scruffy looking tomcat in the jury twitched his whiskers ferociously at this offensive remark.

“Humans,” Jinx resumed, “are a pest. There are no two ways about it. They are always picking you up or nearly strangling you, especially that young human whippersnapper of a boy, and they respond most slowly when called for. True, there are times when a good scratch under the neck is a pleasant way to relax after a hard day, but the costs far outweigh that benefit. If it were not for the regular, though somewhat unappetizing, rations, I wouldn’t put up with their nonsense.”

Diamond lifted a paw. “Hear hear,” she said with heartfelt depth. After a moment, she called up the last witnesses, “my sisters and brother, the rabbits.”

Five rabbits in varying colors hopped forth from the crowd. They all touched noses respectfully with Diamond, then lined themselves up in a neat row. Willow, the fluffiest, spoke first.

“Well I know I’m in the minority here, but I think humans are decent creatures. Sure, they can be pretty annoying when they chase you all over the pen trying to squish the fluff out of you, but in general they’re pretty sweet. They often bring us delicious treats like willow branches or fresh spring grass or maybe a mess of dandelions. Yes, they’re a decent lot, for all their shortcomings.”

Clementine, Willow’s rival, spoke up next. “I object!” she shouted. “I object most strongly! Humans are nothing but pesky two-legged workers of ill deeds. They are always trying to corner you, always snatching you off of safe ground and holding you insecurely in their clumsy hands. And they get so angry when I bite them, as if they didn’t have it coming! As if calling me “Booger Nuggy” wasn’t enough to make any self-respecting rabbit a bit on edge. I mean, really!”

Snickers hopped up to the haybale. “I, for one, agree with Willow. The way to a buck’s heart is through his stomach, as they always say, and humans certainly do well in that department! Mmm, I could really go for some more of that fresh grass…” he trailed off wistfully, licking his lips with a tiny tongue.

Lily, who looked like she had eaten rather too much fresh grass, waddled her large self forward. She said, between wheezes, “I… I think… humans are… pretty nice, even if… some of them… are a little… insulting. But my human… always says my eyes are pretty… so I forgive them.” She batted her large dark eyes, which were in fact quite beautiful, although they were often half hidden by the blubber surrounding them.

Lastly Olaf, a nervous white rabbit with startling red eyes, spoke. “I-I don’t hold with humans. Th-they just aren’t predictable. I mean l-look at me! I’m obviously a d-doe, but that silly human b-boy thought I was a buck and named me O-Olaf! It’s a disgrace, I tell you, a disgrace!” Olaf shook her head remorsefully.

Diamond, who happened to be Olaf’s especial friend, quite agreed with her and proceeded to expound her agreement in such long-winded terms that Mrs. Cowe nearly fell over with boredom-induced exhaustion. Thankfully Maggie nipped at her heels just in time.

At last Diamond reached the end of her speech, and addressed the jury. “Now, my friends and fellow animals, I leave it to you. You have heard our witnesses and must make the decision yourselves. What will you decide? Are humans kind, peaceful creatures, or are they simply pests who make our lives miserable? It is your choice.”

A murmur vibrated through the jury at this. Heifers and tomcats, roosters and does conferred among themselves in loud whispers. Finally they raised their heads and one of the tomcats stepped forward.

“Your Honor, we have discussed the matter, and we find humans…”

By this time most of the witnesses and audience were chanting, “Guil-TY, guil-TY, guil-TY!”

The tomcat waited until the noise died down. “As I was saying,” he glared, “we, the jury, find humans… GUILTY!”

A deafening cheer erupted from the crowd, far overpowering the scattered boos and frowns.

The stars winced a little from their high perch, and backed away from the roar.

“DOWN WITH HUMANS! DOWN WITH HUMANS!” the animals thundered.

Suddenly, over at the farmhouse, a light blinked on.

“DRIVE THEM OUT, WE SAY!”

Another light.

“WE CAN TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES!”

Crunching footsteps.

Suddenly a young calf standing near the door wobbled quickly to the haybale. “EVERYONE, LISTEN TO ME!” it shouted in a quavering voice. “THE FARMER IS COMING!”

A stifling blanket of silence suddenly dropped on the barn; the sound of a hundred voices holding their breath.

The door creaked open. A man stood silhouetted in the moonlight, the beam of his flashlight cutting effortlessly through the darkness. The flashlight fell upon dilapidated haybales, a creaky floor full of holes, and air filled with dust. He squinted his tired eyes, rubbed them, peered into the blackness again, and shook his head.

“Some dream,” he muttered to himself. Then he turned around and walked slowly back to the house. Maggie, a happy Labrador retriever, trotted joyfully beside him. Six rabbits rustled the straw in their cage. Thousands of chickens clucked and crowed in their chicken houses. Many cows raised their heavy heads to look sleepily at him. A meowing black cat met him at the farmhouse door.

“Some dream,” the farmer said again.

And the animals never felt led to correct him.

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Hee hee! I had so much fun writing that. I hope you enjoyed it! Most of the animals in there were our pets, and I drew a lot of inspiration from real life. (We really do have an old white barn with creaky floorboards and holes, and my brother Jeff really does kinda torture our cat, Jinx. XD )

***Allison***

P. S. Oh, by the way, thank you all SO much for your feedback in the last post! I’m so happy you like photography posts because I really do like posting them. I’ll probably post mostly photography, especially in spring and fall, but I definitely won’t only post that because I can’t resist sprinkling in writing, art, and other things like that. 😉 Thanks again, guys!

P. P. S. As you’ve probably noticed by now if you’re actually reading this on my blog, I’ve changed my design! What do you think? I mainly just changed the header and button, as well as the little “About Me” picture and description on the sidebar, but I’m still working on a few more changes.

The Warm and the Fuzzy: Part 2

Are you ready for some more Warm and Fuzzy? Cat lovers, read on. 😀

Casey:

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A mini photoshoot of Casey on our fuzzy cube: (from the room makeover)

(Click on any photo in the collage to enlarge.)

The Story of the Feather Boa:

We put a feather boa around Jinx, and Casey got SO scared of him! She must have thought he was an awfully strange, fluffy, pink-and-black creature. XD It was hilarious!

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Look at her! XD

 

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Jinx is resigned to his fate.

Casey tried to poke the strange creature to see if it was scary, and it was!

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Jinx:

Here’s another GIF of Jinx with the feather boa. He was trying to clean himself but it didn’t work too well. For some reason I think this is hilarious! XD Poor guy. 😛

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Jinx’s yellowish greenish eyes looked so pretty against the green leaves that I had to take pictures! XD

(Again, click a picture to enlarge.)

 Kittens and Violet:

Remember the barn kittens from this post? Here they are again! My cousin adopted one of the gray and white kittens, and I think farm employees took the other ones.

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Violet’s eyes are really pretty! I edited them to make them stand out even more.

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And that’s about it! Which picture was your favorite?

Do you like cats or dogs better? If you like dogs, you’ll love the next episode of Warm and Fuzzy! 😀 Hee hee, that sounded like a movie advertisement. XD

***Allison***

P. S. If you are a participant of WordCrafters 2, please read this! I will be on vacation the 20th-31st of July, so I won’t be adding parts to the WordCrafters 2 page. BUT! Please continue writing your chapters – just notify the next person on the list when you’re finished. I’ll update the story when I get back. Gracias!

Jinx’s Diary: Part 2

jinx's diary poster

Jinx is back with the rest of his diary! (See part 1 here.)

My favorite entry on here is the first (rather lengthy) one. XD

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Dear Diary,                                       3-12-12 to 5-1-12

I have spent a long time compiling an ensiclowpeedia (I spelled that my self) of human words and their meanings. Now I am ready to present it to you!

Humans – First I shall give you a complete description of humans in case you have never seen one up close. Humans stand on their hind-legs, and they use their front legs to do all sorts of things, like feeding me. Each of their four paws are split into five thin pieces. The longer ones on their front paws they call “fingers” and the shorter ones on their hind paws they call “toes.” Humans have long fur on the tops of their heads, but they barely have any on the rest of their body! (Sounds kind of like those ugly hairless cats to me – BLECCH!) I have noticed that the lady humans generally have longer head-fur and they put all sorts of things in it. They say it’s to keep it tidy, but I think it makes it look messier. Humans’ noses are not at all like the delicate instruments we cats have. Some human noses are HUGE, and some are not too big, but you can be assured that the ugliest cat nose will beat the pretties human nose any day. Humans’ lips are very strange too. They are usually a thick line of light pink, unless a human paints its lips with a different color. Gross!

Clothes – Since the humans don’t have proper fur, they need artificial fur to stay warm. They call this artificial fur “clothing” or “clothes.” The humans (some more than others) seem to take pride in having several different sets of artificial fur in quite unnatural colors. Often the fur will have designs or pictures stamped on it. It seems to me it would be a lot easier if the humans just stuck to one kind of fur, like we do!

Washing Machine – the humans seem somehow reluctant to lick themselves or their fur clean, so instead they have a strange machine to clean their “clothes” for them. They dump their dirty sets of fur in a hole in the machine, shut a lid, and push several buttons. When the machine turns on, it makes a terrifying whirring sound.

Baths – Just as the washing machine is the human’s way of cleaning their artificial fur, baths are their way of cleaning the rest of themselves. You know what a normal cat-bath is – a lick or two and your done – but I’ll bet you’d be astonished at a human bath! First, the humans take off their artificial fur, then – here comes the shocker – they get into WATER! Yes, you heard me right, the humans actually take their baths in WATER! I can’t stand getting caught in a sprinkle, much less getting drenched on purpose! Humans are strange, strange beings.

Vacuum Cleaner – You know I said the washing machine was terrifying? Well it is NOTHING compared to the dreaded “vacuum cleaner.” It is an awful machine the humans use for cleaning their floors. (Humans are obsessed with cleaning things.) They pull a long black string out of the end of it, stick the end of the string into the wall, and (gulp!) turn it on! Then… then the machine starts emitting an exceedingly earsplitting roar, and the mouth at the end of it’s long neck sucks up anything and everything in its path. No doubt it could… GULP!… suck up a cat! I – I’ve never tried an experiment to see if that would work, and I never want to. Let’s move on to the next subject.

Food, etc. – Humans have very strange eating habits. I will explain what the things are, and then put the human word in parentheses. They sit up at this long piece of wood (table), and put several strange tools and utensils (silverware) in front of them to eat with. The humans not only have strange eating utensils, but they also eat strange things and eat them in a strange way. For example, I will tell you about their meal today. First they all sat around the “table,” then they closed their eyes and bowed their heads and and the man human talked for a bit, and then they began eating. They were having “hot-dogs” which seem to be a favorite among humans. Though I have learned to thoroughly hate dogs, I think it repulsive that humans actually cook and eat them. I mean, one moment they’re hugging and petting a dog, and the next moment they sit down to a meal of “hot dogs!” But I digress… Most of the humans used their paws to hold a “fork” or “spoon” to eat their food, but some just used their paws, which seems wisest to me. There was other food too: some large crispy, yellowish flakes, and some crunchy orange sticks that they dipped in white gooey stuff and ate.

 

Dear Diary,                                             6-15-12

The lady and girl humans went “shopping” and came back with a FISH! Of all the things that could live in my house, why a FISH? They call him Billy – I could have chosen a better name, but of course they didn’t ask me. I have to admit, he is kind of a pretty color – a dark, almost purple, blue – but you also have to admit that he is a VERY boring pet. All he does is swim and eat. Now I, on the other hand, am handsome and interesting and… but I guess I won’t list all of my good traits or it would take too long.

 

Dear Diary,                                             7-11-12

There has been an infestation of mice, and I hardly have time to write, I am so busy catching mice! Ah, the glories of being a cat! One other thing – I seem to be getting just a touch wider from my mouse feasts. Nah, it’s probably my imagination.

 

Dear Diary,                                             8-21-12

The humans have noticed that I gained a little bit of weight. I think I heard one LAUGHING at me! Of all the nerve! What’s a cat to do if he can’t do his job without being laughed at?!

 

Dear Diary,                                                   9-29-12

I’m going to list all my nicknames. (I can’t be sure I spelled them right, because human sounds are hard to translate into Catese.) Jinxy, Jinxy-boy, Spooch (I hate this one!), Kitty Moocher, Cat, Good Boy, Bad Boy. My personal favorite is “Bad Boy.” It just rolls off the tongue like mouse pie. Ahh! But for some reason, the humans don’t look happy when they call me that, and they usually say it really loudly. I wonder why?

 

Dear Diary,                                             10-20-12

This will be my last entry in you, Diary #1, because this your last page. I’ll have to start a Diary #2, I suppose. But before I leave, I just want to say that I enjoyed my time with you. Maybe one day this Diary will become famous, and I will make sure to give some of the credit to your lovely smooth paper and straight lines. Farewell, dearest Diary!

Yours truly, Jinx The Marvelous

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XD What was your favorite part?

Oh, and in case you were wondering, we no longer have Billy the fish because he died. 😦 But we do have a tank of fish on our windowsill. Here are two pictures of Jinx looking longingly at them. (Sorry ’bout the cloudy water. :/ )

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If I could just… reach through… that glass… *Slurp*

 

***Allison***

Jinx’s Diary: Part 1

Hello, folks! Years ago I wrote a little story called “Jinx’s Diary.” It’s about Jinx, our cat, and his musings on life, from catching his first mouse to compiling an encyclopedia of human oddities. I recently got it out and revised it for a… ahem, a project we’re working on (more about that when we finish it :D), and I thought I’d share it with you too!

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(Note: When Jinx mentions his “handwriting,” it’s because on the Word Processor I changed the fonts to make parts of it look sloppy or neat, but on WordPress, fonts don’t work. 😦 So, when he says “my handwriting is better” it had a neater font than before. You’ll just have to imagine it, I guess. 😀 )

Now presenting, “Jinx’s Diary: Part 1.” Enjoy!

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DeaR DiaRY                        8-22-11

i LeaRNeD HoW To WRiTe BuT MoM HaS To HeLP WiTH SPeLLiNG

 

DeaR DiaRY                        8-28-11

ToDAY i PlaYeD WiTH MY SiBLiNGS. i aLSo PlaYeD WiTH THe DoGS. TheY aRe NiCe.

 

dear diary                              9-4-11

I got some cheese from mr and mrs today. i like cheese. i learned lots of small letters. THESE ARE BIG LETTERS and these are small letters.

 

Dear Diary,                        9-11-11

Mom says I have improved in writing. She told me about PUCSHUACHION. That is a big word, but I spelled it myself.

 

Dear Diary                         9-18-11

Mr. and Mrs. are doing something with a bent piece of plastic. Pictures are on one side and there are buttons with letters like the ones I am writing on the side they set on the table. There is also something they call a mouse that they move with their paws. I think Mom needs to teach the humans about mice, because I saw that thing, and it was NOT a mouse. It didn’t even have fur! Sometimes they stroke its back and the pictures and letters on the plastic go down and down. I do not know what the plastic thing is. Oh. I just asked Mom and she says it is a CUMPOOTER. I spelled that myself. Mom lets me spell some words by myself. I am going to stop writing now because my paws hurt.

 

Dear Diary,                                                     9-25-11

Mom taught us how to catch mice today. She graded us on our learning. Here is the order from highest grade to lowest grade: Meatloaf, Pork Chop (that’s me!), Roast Beef, and Sausage. Sausage only lost because she tripped and scared away the mice. She falls down a lot because she is clumsy. But I can’t see Sausage anymore, because some humans came and took her away. Some other humans took Meatloaf. Now only Roast Beef and I are left, and I am very sad. I wonder where my sisters went. I hope I can see them soon. Did you notice that my writing is better? I have been practicing so it won’t be so jiggly.

 

Dear Diary,                                                             10-10-11

I have not written for a while because something very exciting happened. One day some people came into the house. There were several small humans and a big one. They started playing with me and the dogs. They laughed a lot. Then they picked me up and put me in their big rolling thing that Mrs. calls a CAR, and they took me away! I was scared, and I wondered when they would bring me back to Mom. They took me into their house and put me down. I did not know what to do, so I hid. They got lots of rolly things and stringy things for me to play with. They were very kind but also VERY loud. My ears hurt after they shouted and laughed at me. I miss Mom and Roast Beef a lot, but it is exciting here

P. S. The humans call me “Jinx” now. What is wrong with “Pork Chop?”

 

Dear Diary,                                                             10-28-11

Today an amazing thing happened. These tiny, wet, cold, white things just started falling out of the sky! It was… it was EXTRAORDINARY! (I don’t know why “extra ordinary” means “amazing,” but it does.) At first when I saw it I was scared because I thought the sky was crumbling into pieces. But the sky is still there, so I’m pretty sure it’s not that. I’m just going to call it sky-crumbles though, because I don’t know what it is. The humans were all excited and ran outside with lots of extra fabric on top of them to keep them warm. They stomped around and made white balls stacked on top of each other, and slid down hills on strange pieces of bright plastic. It looked like fun, so I went outside to see what it was like. Diary, do not ever, EVER step on white sky crumbles. They stick to your fur and melt and get you sopping wet. And I HATE getting wet. I stayed inside after that. The humans came in after a long time and made something in a bowl. They used sky crumbles and milk and some other things, and then they ATE it! Yes, the humans actually ate the sky crumbles.

P. S. I still haven’t seen Mom and Roast Beef. I am beginning to think that maybe I’ll never see them again. 😦 That was a sad face.

 

Dear Diary,                                                   11-09-11

Nothing unusual has happened, except that I’ve been practicing my handwriting. Do you like it? I think it is very nice, but it takes me a long time to write. The humans are beginning to talk about “Thanksgiving,” whatever that means.

 

Dear Diary,                                                   11-18-11

I found out what Thanksgiving was! It is a time when humans take time to remember all of their blessings (I have no idea what a “blessing” is, so don’t ask me) and also eat a lot of food. Food sounds good to me, even if I don’t know what a “blessing” is.

 

Dear Diary,                                                   12-11-11

The humans have this noise on incessantly (new word!) that they call CHRISTMAS MUSIC. They seem to like it, especially when it is extra bad. It hurts my ears. The humans brought a TREE in the house today! It was a very tall evergreen tree. They put it in a room and hung all sorts of things on it, like lights and shiny balls. (I wanted to play with the shiny balls really badly, but I didn’t because the humans would not like that.) Then they gave the tree water and gazed at it admiringly. I don’t think bringing a tree in the house is a good idea AT ALL! What if a spider climbs out of the needles? It makes me shiver just thinking about it.

 

Dear Diary,                                             12-25-15

Today all the humans went wild! They tore open boxes wrapped with bright, glittering paper. They screeched and yelled and oohed and ahhed over everything they took out. They call this CHRISTMAS. Humans are very, very strange.

 

Dear Diary,                                             1-10-12

I have to write a “12” on the end of my date because it’s a new year! I met some beautiful lady cats around the barn today. I like them very much. I think I’ll marry one of them one day. (But don’t tell them I said that!)

 

Dear Diary,                                             1-23-12

Nothing much is going on except I visit sometimes with a beautiful lady cat named Rabbit. (Of all the nerve! To call a cat RABBIT!) She is the one I want to marry the most.

 

Dear Diary,                                             2-11-12

I am HEARTBROKEN! Rabbit doesn’t like me anymore! She is going to get married to another cat. He is huge and ugly and mean. I don’t like him at all, and Rabbit shouldn’t either. Well, if she doesn’t know a good cat when she sees one, then – then… Well, I’ll never speak to her again! Diary, I am extremely heartsick and sorrowful. Life is hardly worth living now that Rabbit doesn’t like me.

 

Dear Diary,                                                   2-26-12

I am so happy right now I could burst! No, Rabbit isn’t going to marry me (I solemnly vow never to say her name again) but I CAUGHT MY FIRST MOUSE! Well sure, I caught a mouse at survival class with Mom, but she helped me that time. This time I did it all by myself! It happened like this: I was walking around, looking for Rab… I mean I was just walking around doing nothing when I smelled something suspicious. Yes, that was definitely a strong mouse stench! I could have got so excited that I meowed and scared the mouse away like Roast Beef did once, but I didn’t. I kept as cu as a coolcumber – I mean as cool as a cucumber – and tiptoed ever so quietly towards the smell. Sure enough, there was the mouse! He was the biggest, cleverest, smartest mouse you ever did see, Diary – he was most as big as a rabbit… no a DOG… why, he was most as big as an EPHELAFONT! – but I caught him easy as pie. It was the slyest thing you ever did see, Diary. I just crept up, slowly and softly (that mouse never heard a thing), and then I POUNCED! I took a flying leap, probably 15 feet in the air, and then I just sailed down on top of him. Boy was he surprised! He just about died of fright when he saw me there, my razor-sharp teeth gleaming in the moonlight (uh, sunlight) and growling most ferociously. He probably thought I was a lion! (I have to admit, there was a strong resemblance.) Well then I just lit into him. I caught him up in my iron jaws and carried him for a while. Then I let him down and played a little game of cat and mouse. I would turn my back, and he would think he was free, but then I’d whirl around, quick as lightning, and swat him flying. Then I’d walk away and he’d get up again and run for home, but he never got anywhere. I took care of that. After a while the game got boring because I always won, so I just went and ATE him. My, he was delicious! He was the best thing I ever tasted! He had a strong, savory flavor, with a hint of citrus butter around the edges. My mouth is watering just remembering it! And now I’m afraid I can’t write anymore, Diary, because I’m off to catch another mouse!

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My favorite parts so far are the “sky crumbles” entry and when he catches his first mouse. XD What was your favorite part?

***Allison***

Jinx the Cat’s Rabbity Adventure

Hello, readers! The other day Jinx, our cat, had an adventure that he would like to tell you about. Jinx’s words will be in bold type and mine will be like normal. At the end of Jinx’s story I will be back with a few notes and pictures. But now I will hand it over to Jinx… (Be prepared for a lot of words – Jinx can be rather long-winded sometimes. XD)

Greetings, readers of Allison’s blog! Allison has allowed me, Jinx the cat, to do a guest post on her blog. For this particular post, I shall be telling you about a rather trying adventure I had the other day.

But first, I must tell you a little bit about myself. I am the grand and only feline of Allison’s household, Coffee Bean the cat having only recently passed away. (I will not here discuss in detail my views of the aforesaid Coffee Bean, but let it suffice to say that I bear no great burden of sorrow in now being the supreme ruler of the house.) It seems I will have to describe myself a bit, as Allison did not take a truly good picture of me by myself. I am a sleek, handsome, highly dignified black cat, if I do say so myself. Most generally, I pass my days in reclining in high estate wherever I please, drinking delicious draughts of sweet water from FaussEt, and trying to communicate to my humans all of my complicated needs through desperate meows, purrs, and sometimes – I am sorry to say – a few scratches in dire emergencies. They hardly ever listen to me, I am afraid, but ah… that is the life of a cat.

Now. My adventure began one day when Megan, one of the more trying of my humans, carried me out to the rabbit cage against my wishes. Do you know my views on rabbits? No, I suppose not. I shall inform you. I do not like them – they are simply fluffy vermin who always seem to have a nervous twitch about the nose – that’s what I say. Anyway, Megan carried me out, and I was forced to keep company with these disgusting creatures. At first I hid in a corner tried to keep my clean and polished self away from these creatures. But the air was cold, and I was at last forced to take refuge against the frigid air in the… I hate to say it, but the rabbits’ cage.

With my superior night vision, I could see inside the dark cage which was covered in a blanket. There were (I nearly shuddered with disgust) three rabbits already inside! They went by the names of Diamond, Lily, and Olaf. And as if the situation wasn’t already bad enough, another rabbit soon entered the scene – the extraordinarily fluffy Willow. She is the worst of them. I cannot for the life of me see how the humans like such a disheveled monster as Willow is, but… humans are very strange creatures.

But as I have a stout heart and a strong mind, I concluded to make the best of the circumstances. The one good thing I can say about rabbits is that they are very warming creatures. As I reclined among them, my poor numbed paws grew warm again, my ears began to thaw, and my whiskers lost some of their brittleness. In a few moments, I was actually enjoying my stay in the cage. (But only for the warmth, you understand.) After a bit, Olaf the rabbit approached me and snuggled up close. I tried not to be squeamish, and instead I focused on the extra warmth Olaf brought with him.

Even thought the humans were squealing over how “adorable” I was, I could not help feeling a bit sleepy with all of the warmth inside the cage. In fact, I nearly drifted off to sleep a few times.

I waited out the minutes until it was finally time to return to the comfortable house. The humans wanted to leave me in the cage, but the Mother human said that it would not be wise, as she didn’t trust me with the rabbits so close at hand. Of all the nerve! The humans should know by now that I have much too refined a taste to eat inferior rabbit meat! Anyway, Allison came out to take me inside, and was surprised that I resisted her grasp. I suppose she thought that I was actually enjoying the rabbits company. On the contrary, the only reason I resisted was that I was somewhat afraid that the vicious dog they call Maggie was outside the rabbit pen, waiting to destroy me the moment Allison should step outside. Maggie was actually in the kennel, but how was I to know? Finally Allison brought me inside, and ever since I have been trying to recuperate from that horrible adventure by sleeping twice as much on warm, comfortable chairs and sofas.

I’m sorry about all of the high and mighty language, but Jinx is rather proud of himself, as you can see. And another thing: I’m not totally sure that he was telling the truth when he said that he only enjoyed being in the cage for warmth. For one thing, it wasn’t even that cold – not nearly enough to numb his dainty paws at least – and for another thing, I have some pictures as proof that Jinx seems to have got along quite well with the rabbits – especially Olaf. Feel free to browse the evidence. (Mouse over the pictures to see any captions.)

Was that not cute and convincing proof of Jinx’s enjoyment? (Well, at least some of the time.) It looks like he downright made friends with the rabbits! And since poor Olaf hardly ever gets a photoshoot, here is a mini one just for him. (Scroll over the pictures to see any captions, and click the pictures to enlarge.)

Wow! I have written over ONE THOUSAND words for this post! That might be a record… In other news, I’m almost ready to open my Etsy shop! 😀 😀 😀 I might open it tomorrow, but I’m not sure. I’ll do a post about it when it’s ready. Have a lovely Sunday afternoon!

***Allison***

Creatures and Critters

Here are some pictures of a few of the creatures and critters around our farm.

A green frog  (we are actually keeping her in a terrarium in our house)

2014-9-8-Allison(Frog,Potatoes) 009

An orb weaver spider – see the zigzag in her web?

2014-9-8-Allison(Frog,Potatoes) 010 2014-9-8-Allison(Frog,Potatoes) 012

A bumblebee

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A monarch – Did you know you can tell if it’s a monarch or a viceroy by checking if it has a black band across its bottom wings?  If it doesn’t have the band, it’s a monarch, if it does, it’s a viceroy.  This is a monarch – no black band.

-Allison(eggs, monarch) 016

Some kind of sulphur butterfly

-Allison (praying mantis video) 016 -Allison (praying mantis video) 021

?

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A praying mantis – it is actually eating a bumblebee – see its head in one claw and its body in the other? (Gross!)

-Allison (praying mantis video) 012

And here is Jinx, our cat, with spiderwebs on his whiskers.  He doesn’t look too pleased to have his picture taken.☺

-Allison (praying mantis video) 010

Which picture was your favorite?

***Allison***

Our Funny Pets

If the dog is having a good day…2014-7-22-Allison(new camera) 002The cat is having a bad one…

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These are our pets.  The dog’s name is Maggie, and the cat’s name is Jinx.

I hope you got some laughs from this…

***Allison**