Welp, today I officially turn twenty. O.o I feel so old, good gracious. So far my birthday has been amazing, especially the part where almost 30 of my friends sent me birthday videos that GAHHH made me smile so hard. If you’re reading this, dears – thank you for making my day X100. ❤ ❤ ❤ I love you girls so much!
*deep breath* Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. This birthday post is going to be one of my favorite kinds – a pretty golden hour photoshoot, because those make me happy. 🙂 And instead of photo captions, maybe I’ll do kind of a “Thoughts On…” ramble about how it feels to not be a teenager anymore because whyyyy does everyone act like it’s terrible to be one? It can be, but it can also be wonderful. So yeah.
Let’s go for a walk and take pictures of flowers and chat about life. Let’s have a golden day, shall we?
So… I’m not a teenager anymore, guys. Phew, I made it out of that dark tunnel, huh? I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Seriously, though, people seem to have a terrible opinion of the teenage years (and teenagers, unfortunately). Why?
Why do we say “teenager” like a dirty word and shake our heads at those humans who have the misfortune to be between 13 and 19 years old? I have never understood that and still don’t, even from my high height of being newly twenty. 😛
It makes me sad, because 1) sometimes they’re right and the teenage years are where things start to fall apart, but 2) sometimes they’re wrong, because those years can be… oh, just splendid! Why does no one talk about the good parts??
Being a teenager is not inherently bad, anymore than being 5 or 32 or 98 is inherently bad. My friends, it’s not the number that’s attached to your respective year – it’s the way you use it. You know that as well as I do.
I think the reason why the teenage years get such a bad rap is that there’s huge potential for disaster because so much changes so fast. And the faster you drive, the harder you can crash. It’s easy to lean the wrong way around one of those sharp curves and fall out the door. Especially since, okay, you’re right, we kids don’t always have our seatbelts on. Oops.
But my goodness, the ride is exhilarating!
Maybe I’m in the minority, but I honestly loved my teenage years. (Look at me sounding all mature. *shakes head*) Not every part of them, of course, but who loves everything about any age?
My favorite part about being a teenager was the growing. It was exhilarating to grow so much physically and mentally and spiritually. I didn’t realize how thirsty I was until I saw that huge river to drink from. For me, being a teenager was expanding, was unfurling, was filling.
All those books I read and those essays I wrote (ew) have grown me and changed me. So did the friends I made and the churches I’ve been a part of and my wonderful family I’ve lived with. Thank you to all the people who have pruned me and shaped me during the years when I was shooting up and blossoming. You have helped to make me who I am.
I guess I’m never going to be full grown, and that’s fine with me! I hope that changing never stops. I hope I will always look at the world with wonder because there’s so much to laugh about, cry about, learn about. There’s so MUCH. This life is full and overflowing with things to discover and people to love and an infinite God to get to know better. Isn’t that a marvelous thing?
If growing up means that sort of wide-eyed, open-palmed, soaking-in, I want to grow up forever. I want to enjoy the process instead of slanting so far toward the result. It’s messy but I love it. I love it.
I want to live so that in another ten years I can look back as I can now and say that I like the person God has grown me to be much better than the girl I was back then. I want to look back and see how every year was God’s faithfulness proved, whether by his strength in my weakness or his hand in my success.
I want to keep growing. There’s so much more out there, you know? I’ve left those golden days behind, but it looks to me like the path ahead is glowing still. There are golden years ahead as well.
Make me ready, Lord. I’m ready to do it with you.
*happy sigh* I loved taking these photos and writing this post and I hope you guys enjoyed it too. 🙂 Thanks for reading my words for almost six years now and hopefully for many more in the future. Here’s to more sunshine and shadows and messy, beautiful life, my friends!
Am I officially an old person now? What are your thoughts on teenager-ness? What are or were the golden days for you?
Thanks so much for reading, dears, and have a lovely day!
P. S. Photos taken with my Nikon D3400 and a 35mm lens. Edited with picmonkey.com.